…A cold paralyzing horror: a glimpse into the subhuman…the sickness of life beginning again: the exhausting awareness of every ache. What the hand does in reaching, a misery of awareness; loss of memory in small things; hatred of necessary routines; hatred but not fear of dark; watching the skin, the fingers; overeating; a full preoccupation with unnecessary tasks; weakness in the morning; fear of headlights; distrust of children; a tide of loss.
Theodore Roethke, notebooks (I didn’t know about these!)
At his death, Pulitzer-prize winning poet Theodore Roethke left behind 277 spiral notebooks full of poetry fragments, aphorisms, jokes, memos, journal entries, random phrases, bits of dialog, commentary, and fugitive miscellany. Within these notebooks, Roethke’s mind roved freely, moving from the practical to the transcendental, from the halting to the sublime. Fellow poet and colleague David Wagoner distilled these notebooks—twelve linear feet of bookshelf—into a wise and rollicking collection that shows Roethke to be one of the truly phenomenal creative sources in American poetry.
Probably going to break my only-buy-books-by-women rule to get this.
Maybe I’ll also buy myself a notebook?
Yuko Shimizu (b. 1946, Chiba prefecture, Japan) - Cover created for DC Comics Vertigo series The Unwritten issue No. 44, 2013
(Okay, I just looked up Yuko Shimizu because I really like this image. But to be clear, I’m sharing the following because I’m a pedant who can’t help myself— there are 2 Yuko Shimizus. They’re both illustrators. One of them was born in Chiba prefecture in 1946. That Yuko Shimizu created Hello Kitty. She is, I hope, very rich. But she didn’t make this illustration! This Yuko Shimizu did.
I still think of this song whenever I start work in a new place
Happy first day to me
To the people who like “That Don’t Impress Me Much” and “Man, I Feel Like a Woman” but aren’t familiar with Shania’s pre-Come On Over oeuvre:
(a) you’re from the East Coast, aren’t you
(b) you’re going to like this, I promise
Behind The CavesOn the tour of our school I deliberately hung back, the last to enter a room and the last to leave. Here was the front desk where you signed in if you were late. Here was the hall lined with class pictures, including one with a famous actress camouflaged amid the smooth, blurred faces. Here was the auditorium where I played Corelli concertos and Hello, Dolly! on my violin. Only now the auditorium was condemned. We stood just inside its doors, lights off, straining to see the stage, the scent of wood and dust and warm velvet and an intangible nostalgia flooding me like a dark tide. At the reunion I took stock of who had come. Not my friend, the Brain. Not my friend, the Hippie. Not my on-again-off-again Crush. Not my stand partner and Rival. No one from my AP English class. No one from my bus route. Not the Queen of the school. Not the Outcast, either.by Randon Billings Noble.
Wow, this is really good.
1 week without a job. My life seems to be wadding together around a few key activities.
- Sleep. Whether I get enough, or not. It’s a preoccupation.
- German philosophy. Lol I knowwwww but it’s hard not to take an interest when the person you talk to most won’t stop talking about Marx.
- Practicing math. For reasons of curiosity, pride, and career goals, I’ve decided to take calculus finally. I’ve spent about 12 hours re-teaching myself precalc on Khan Academy. (I started yesterday.) I WILL test into a legitimate calculus class when the time comes.
- Dicking around in the kitchen. Getting a baking dish so dirty that I have to scrub at it over a number of days, a little at a time. Scrubbing at it whenever the math stuff starts swimming in front of my eyes.
- Job hunt. I’m interviewing at a couple of places right now, I feel like something’s going to break through soon so I’m holding off submitting new applications for a bit. (Related: does every place do 2-3 rounds of interviews now? Is this normal? Seems like a waste of time for all involved.)
- Watching Coffee Prince. Self-explanatory.
Missouri Botanical Garden’s Orchid Folios
Schomburgkia is a genus that no longer exists. The former Schomburgkia orchids are now split between genuses Laelia and Myrmecophila. The taxonomists giveth and taketh away.